Mother

Before i kiss this mid semester holiday goodbye, i would like to post something about my mother(the wonder woman of mine). This is because i get back my ass off from home way much earlier than i should have and now after this fruitful weekend, the moment i step back to this small world of myself, i feel all the loneliness surround me. It's awful, uneasy...this just make me think of nobody else but God and mother.

Mother(i don't use to call mother but mamy, dang, Brave influenced)
the wonder mama of mine, never get to replace by anyone. This holiday i met mother in Marudi not at my home. She went to fetch me and my sister together with my big brother. I just feel so good to see my mother.  After back to grandmother house, had a lot of fun too but the most warm hearted was mother brought me go  walk walk around around grandmother house, to see the fruits, to go to the kolam(T_T in english is?) and blaaa~ skipped

Now the scene is in Miri(back from Marudi)
Mother busy cooking for dinner and me decide to help her with the "dabai". She want to make it something like tempoyak and so i can bring some to jb. And that is the time i talk to her about my study.

I: mamy, what should i do? My academic really worst, that day one of my subject for test1 i hand it nearly blank...
Mamy: Hmm, haih i dont want to listen neh if keep like that...
I: Mamy, i really did try my best. but the paper really hard, i can even squeeze an answer for it.
Mamy: Then what you want to do?
I: i got think to change course but it seems gonna be extend, it's really not easy to study engineer mamy...
Mamy: Okay then I will be more shame when people ask why your study take so long~
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*deep in my heart i feel so bad to mother, she is really hoping the best from her daughter but i would only bring trouble for her...*

i never thought i could have the courage to talk about this to her...
Mother, i promise no matter what happen and how suffer i study i will finish my degree, eventhough it's not the flying colors but i must graduate, like sister..
^add
that morning before i back to jb, we went for breakfast and after that before go back, mother go buy 1kg rice, a very nice one and quite pricey
the moment she get in the car and said see what i buy
 I was like "mum is is for me?!"
"no la, it's for home de"
"yerr, then when want to cook?"
"later la, steam it baru nice"
"yay good!"
but that day i didnt get to eat and before leave home, mother rushing to kitchen cause i forget to bring the dabai tempoyak but when she came out, she bring a plastic. (it's the rice!) i was so touching, couldnt tear, i keep it mother you dont worry...
mother that day before i go in the boarding hall also i feel like crying, hugging you, i hate goodbye. no matter how much, i will still feel so bad of leaving you, leaving home...no matter how i have bf or friend can never win the family. Mother i will keep your advice in mind.

I hope you always in a good health, that's all. I love you<3 p="p">
p/s: typing while tears flow nonstop:'(